We don’t walk very far but we do turn to a less travelled road where Tsuyoshi is apparently a patron.
“Chichi, my friends and I like this place, it doesn’t get crowded.” He says as we enter.
It’s a small store with just three tables inside. The owner is an old woman who offers us some rice cakes for free. It’s then that I knew why he’d prefer this place. He has a bit of a sweet tooth. I tell the lady to bring us some agar jelly drinks, here in Aizu it is typically sweetened with caramel, but I also ask her to bringi tea for Hide. Tea in aizu isn’t as strong as in Ito, in fact it’s almost clear but you can’t tell since it’s served in dark lacquer tea-cups.
Sitting on the table with Tsuyoshi beside me and Hide across, we wait.
“Umm…” He looks at Hide and grins. “How do you do? I’m Tsuyoshi.”
Ah he’s starts, not even giving me the chance to introduce her to him. I suppose his curiosity has reached it’s peak.
“Are you a friend of Chichi-ue?” He asks her. I’d scold him but in a way I’m glad he’s not found her company disagreeable or at the very least “odd”.
Tsuyoshi-kun
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I follow Hajime and Tsuyoshi-kun to a small establishment. It’s quiet now but I bet when a lot of boys get out of kendo it’s much different…
I’m brought tea and take a sip, it’s a different taste than I’m used to but on this cold day, I welcome the warmth.
>>Umm?EUR? How do you do? I?EUR(TM)m Tsuyoshi.
I can’t help but grin back. “I’m Yagi Hide, but you may call me Hide-san, if you would like.” I take one of the rice cakes, and answer, “and yes, I’m an old friend of your father.” He seems very open and friendly, Eiji-kun was right. At least he doesn’t resent me for being around during a visit from Hajime whom he obviously adores.
“I saw you in practice today; you were quite good, Tsuyoshi-kun. How long have you been working at it?” I look down at the almost-gone rice cakes. “Tell me, what should we order? I’m from Kyoto so I don’t know the best of Aizu food, what do you like most here?”
Saitou:
Hide introduces herself. Observing the little interaction between them, puts me at ease somewhat. She didn’t seem skittish around him either, in fact she compliments him.
I saw you in practice today; you were quite good, Tsuyoshi-kun. How long have you been working at it??EUR?
“You saw?” His eyes light up. “I started three years ago and haven’t stopped since!”
I ruffle his hair, “He didn’t tell me about it too.”
“Chichi-ue, you wouldn’t have let me!”
“But Yoshi you’re still so young.”
“But you did it every day!”
I laugh. I did practice in front of him many times in our backyard.
Tell me, what should we order? I?EUR(TM)m from Kyoto so I don?EUR(TM)t know the best of Aizu food, what do you like most here
“Hmmm!” He cups his chin, “I like Ramen Katsu. We should order that!”
I look at Hide, “Well you might as well try it Hide.” Oh I know it won’t hold a candle to her cooking but it is unique. Where else in Japan can you get Ramen without the soup but have it drown in Katsu sauce? The obaa-san hears us and motions that it’s being made. Not that I’m going to eat somethign that sweet.
Turning back to my son, I hold him by the shoulder. This should be done now instead of later. He should know who Hide is to me, especially now that he doesn’t seem averse to her. “Yoshi, Hide-san is more than just an old friend to me.” I tell him, “She’s been taking care of me in Tokyo and lets me live in her home.”
He stops and tilts his head at me. For a moment I’m concerned that I did the wrong thing. But then he looks back at Hide…
“Chichi-ue likes soba! You should make that all the time!”
I smile as the two go back and forth about his kendo training. “I used to watch your father practice, a long time ago. He even tried to teach me, but that’s a much longer story,” I laugh.
>I like Ramen Katsu
“Mmmm… I’ve not had that.” I look over to the kitchen area. “I’m looking forward to trying it.” I wonder how they flavor their broth here? Katsu?
Then… he explains me to Tsuyoshi-kun, or, as well as one can explain such things to a young boy. “Takes care of me.” “Lets me live in her home.”
I smile. That and much more… as he is to me.
Then Tsuyoshi-kun shocks me by what he says next, and I’m struck for a moment, and then… I slowly smile.
“Hai, hai, I make him soba quite often, and he eats it like a hungry wolf,” I laugh. “Although not every day, but he likes many things I cook.” I look at Hajime, meeting his eyes. “Tsuyoshi-kun, besides being good at kendo and liking Ramen Katsu, what else do you like?”
I wonder, should we tell him about Makoto? It is going well…
Tsuyoshi-kun, besides being good at kendo and liking Ramen Katsu, what else do you like??EUR?
He looks up and thinks for a moment, “Hmm… Did you meet tou-san yet? He’s very nice. He also lets me live in his house. He has a really nice house, there’s sand in the garden and he buys me lots of things.”
Tsuyoshi looks at her, “I have many friends here. I like them!”
“Oh you do? That’s good…” I smile closing my eyes. In a way it is good to hear him talk like this but on the other hand… My thoughts are interrupted when the old lady comes with the ramen.
“Hey why don’t we start eating?” I tell them and take my bowl. I don’t really like this kind of cooking but what the hell. I dig in. So he likes it here huh? -Wonderful-.
I notice the slight change in Hajime’s expression as Tsuyoshi-kun talks about his life here… although I’m troubled a bit by the “buys me lots of nice things”.
Hajime then does one of -those- smiles and attacks his bowl. I take a bite, it’s sweet and not soupy at all. I let the boy eat a bit before speaking again. “I did meet Namazawa-san. That sounds very good Tsuyoshi-kun, lots of friends and a good home. But,” I smile, “you didn’t mention school. What do you like there? I’ve heard your brother enjoys school a good deal.”
From my sleeve I pull out a picture. “This is Makoto-chan, she’s back in Tokyo where your father and I live.” I watch him carefully as I slide it across the table. “She likes school but she also likes to run and look for turtles by the river.”
Tsuyoshi:
This ramen is the best! I can have it all the time! Chichi-ue is quiet but I know he gets like that besides this is GOOD ramen.
?EURoeyou didn?EUR(TM)t mention school. What do you like there? I?EUR(TM)ve heard your brother enjoys school a good deal.?EUR?
“School? Oh it’s -okay-.” I don’t do very well in school but I do -pass-. “Twice a week after school, a tutor drops by to help me.”
Oh she knows about Tsutomu-nii… That’s good! “Tsutomu-nii likes school. A LOT.” I look at Chichi-ue, “He’s not gone back though. Ookaa-san told him he’ll start next year.”
Then the lady shows me a picture of a girl. I take the picture and look at it while still slurping my noodles. “She’s pretty but her name is a boys name.” I give the picture back to Hide-san.
?EURoeShe likes school but she also likes to run and look for turtles by the river.?EUR?
“Are you her Ookaa-san?”
Saitou:
There’s nothing for me to do but listen. I had thought I would need to pry Tsuyoshi for information… But he gives it freely, so at ease with himself and Hide. I wonder if it’s even wise to bring it up at this point…
But then he talks about his brother and I listen while lighting a cigarette. I’m surprised that Tokio has not taken cared of it… That woman will be the death of me someday. Well that’s why I’m here. Or at least one of the reasons why… I look at my youngest son whose now perusing a picture of his sister. I could say something but I’ve lost the capacity to speak it seems.
He certainly seems enthusiastic about the ramen… “Do you get this at home? Or is a going-out sort of treat?” I guess that Namazawa-sensei has servants that see to such things…
>School? Oh it?EUR(TM)s -okay-
Hajime remains quiet, I answer back. “Mmm… but it is important. A good swordsman needs his mind to think of the best ways to strike, practice at school is just like the dojo, in a way.” I smile at him. “In fact, one of the best swordsmen I know – and I’ve known some of the BEST – was a great appreciator of haiku. But it’s good you’re working with a tutor.”
And Tsutomu-kun is not going to school? I glance over to Hajime. “I’ve not met Tsutomu-kun yet, though, but I have met Eiji-kun, he came with us and he’s back at Ueda-sama’s house.”
>>She?EUR(TM)s pretty but her name is a boys name
I smile. “Oh, it can be, but it works for a girl, because it’s just as important for a girl to be sincere, ne? Also, it’s something that is very important to her father and I.”
>>Are you her Ookaa-san?
I nod, my eyes settling on the picture, trying to see… picking out the resemblances between the two. Hajime remains quiet. “She is, and she knows about you. She’d like very much to meet you, and to have two big brothers.” I don’t want to tear at his bonds of loyalty to his mother or Namazawa. But… he does have a father, and a sister as well, and perhaps, I believe in my naive way, all of those bonds can find a way to work together.
Tsuyoshi:
?EURoeDo you get this at home? Or is a going-out sort of treat??EUR?
“Oh tou-san doesn’t let me have this all the time, especially at home.” I finish the bowl and look over chichi-ue, he’s not finished his.
?EURoe A good swordsman needs his mind to think of the best ways to strike, practice at school is just like the dojo, in a way
I nod, “I think so but… I also heard that sometimes it’s just comes naturally. One doesn’t really think about it.”
Chichi-ue looks at me and I grin back at him. He told me that once a long time ago. I wonder if he remembers? But Hide-san says Eiji-nii-san is here!
“Where is he???” I stand up suddenly, “Are we going to see him?”
Chichi-ue shakes his head and I sit back down. “I hope we get to see him.” I tell Chichi-ue and he says soon. That’s good!
?EURoeOh, it can be, but it works for a girl, because it?EUR(TM)s just as important for a girl to be sincere, ne? Also, it?EUR(TM)s something that is very important to her father and I.?EUR?
I nod. “I guess it’s not a bad name for a girl.”
?EURoeShe is, and she knows about you. She?EUR(TM)d like very much to meet you, and to have two big brothers.?EUR?
My brows furrow, I’m not sure what she means. Two big brothers? And meeting me? Huh? I turn to Chichi-ue confused. “Chichi-ue?”
Saitou:
I let the two carry on their conversation, only butting in when Eiji became the topic. I know Tsuyoshi would like to see him but probably not as badly as Tsutomu… But something in this conversation, that I let run away…
Hide introduces Makoto to Tsuyoshi. He turns and has that very confused look on his face. I suppose it was a bit too premature or Hide is pushing too hard. I saw it coming but I did nothing to stop it. But I suppose this is the best time to take the opportunity to bring up the subject…
“If you want to come back with us to Tokyo…” I stare at my son’s face, “You’ll meet Makoto-chan.” I say. I can’t quite find the words to explain this properly without being so blunt. I grit my teeth, I’m not about to deny my daughter either so I place a hand on his shoulder.
“Come back with us. That way you can meet your sister.” I swallow. He stares back and averts his eyes. Damn it! I knew it was too early. I force a chuckle and pat his shoulder, “Don’t worry she’ll come visit you here too.”
>>Oh tou-san doesn?EUR(TM)t let me have this all the time, especially at home.
It -is- rather sweet, I can see why little ones would like it…
>>I think so but?EUR? I also heard that sometimes it?EUR(TM)s just comes naturally. One doesn?EUR(TM)t really think about it.
The way he grins at Hajime… it must have been something he told him. “That’s true, but it’s never a waste of time to sharpen your mind.” I smile, I take schooling seriously since mine was rather lacking, it is remarkable that so many children now have the opportunities to… but I don’t want to sound like I’m scolding, even if it was my place. “But I know you’ll do well, as I saw in the dojo, because that?EUR(TM)s right, a lot of it is natural.”
He seems excited about Eiji-kun, and I nod. “He’s a very nice young man, I like him a lot.” I do…
The change in Tsuyoshi-kun’s expression tells me… maybe I went too far. His eyes almost shut down, and I wonder… in how many directions does he feel pulled in? I look directly at him, tilting my head slightly. “It’s a lot at once, I know, please let me explain a bit. You’re old enough to know about things, ne? You’re very lucky, you have many people that care about you…” I smile softly and wish I could brush that hair out of his eyes, “even though at times it seems like it’s a lot to bear, or hard choices to make.?EUR? I choose my words carefully, but?EUR? circumstances have given me practice in having these sorts of hard conversations with children?EUR?
I look over at Hajime. I know he?EUR(TM)s the sort of man for whom declarations don?EUR(TM)t come easy, I can see from the set expression of his mouth that this is hard for him, and that at times?EUR? it?EUR(TM)s hard for him with the children. ?EURoeWhat your father was trying to say is that he?EUR(TM)d like to be able to see you more. Stay here, come with him?EUR? or some time here, some there, what won?EUR(TM)t change all those people who care about you ?EUR and yes, we would bring Makoto to visit, and she?EUR(TM)s quite the letter writer for a little girl.?EUR?
I lean forward and drop my voice. ?EURoeA man doesn?EUR(TM)t speak of such things, because you know, as a young man yourself, it?EUR(TM)s not suitable for a man. But your father?EUR? he misses you and Tsutomu-kun a lot. Even though there?EUR(TM)s Makoto you and your brother are missing in his life. And while I?EUR(TM)m a very good cook, I can?EUR(TM)t make enough soba to fill that hole. You just learned a lot, so you don?EUR(TM)t have to decide anything right now,?EUR? I look at Hajime, after all, there?EUR(TM)s more to this than what Tsuyoshi-kun will want, there?EUR(TM)s Namazawa (and some money issue) and Tokio to settle with. But maybe this child ?EUR even if he is wonderfully open and loving with Hajime ?EUR doesn?EUR(TM)t really understand how much their father loves them. Children rarely do, it?EUR(TM)s often something one realizes later.
And I can only hope that I’m doing right by Makoto as well, who really -wants- more family to love. Our lonely years in Ito gave her a fierce longing for such connections…
I sit back up and smile, and reach over to pat his hand. ?EURoeSo this is why your father has to bring a nice lady along to this place with a beautiful mountain, to say the things a man doesn?EUR(TM)t say, because a woman are allowed to speak very emotionally.?EUR? I watch him carefully, and then notice the woman hovering on the other side of the room. ?EURoeIf we?EUR(TM)re done eating, why don?EUR(TM)t we pay and then will you help me pick out a present to take back to Makoto-chan? She?EUR(TM)s hopefully being very good and helping out your cousin Yukiko-san while we?EUR(TM)re gone. Oh, and a present for Yukiko-san as well.?EUR? I wonder if he remembers her?
Tsuyoshi:
Hide-san starts talking to me about Chichi-ue. She seems to care about him a lot. I’m really glad for that. People were always getting angry with him. I didn’t know why, well I kind of did, but I’m glad she’s not angry. She tells me that I don’t have to decide right now… but I think she means that I should live with them and be with Makoto. I’ve never had a sister before. I wonder what she’s like?
But…
I glance back at Chichi-ue, he’s now back to smoking and not looking at us. I smile and close my eyes turning to Hide-san I say, “I know a toy that Makoto will like. At the market if we go there today, we can find it.”
Saitou:
?EURoeWhat your father was trying to say is that he?EUR(TM)d like to be able to see you more. Stay here, come with him?EUR?
I should’ve stopped her but I couldn’t find it in me so I just light a cigarette. The moment I saw that look on my son’s face, I knew what the answer was. I don’t know the reasons but that’s not important anymore. At least he took the news of his sister well. Maybe they will see each other someday.
Standing up I go to the counter to pay the old woman. Reaching to my pocket I realize I still have the yams I brought for Tsuyoshi. I could give it to him but after all these sweets, it’s better I don’t. I can’t help but glance back at the table where he and Hide are sitting. There’s something different about him, as his father I could not at all miss it. I wish I -did- however.
“Thank you.” I say to the old woman, “Does he come here a lot?”
“Oh you mean Tsuyoshi-kun? He does but usually with a whole group of boys.” She smiles happily, “It’s hard to miss them, they can be loud but boys will be boys I suppose. His father usually comes to fetch him after school. That is one lucky child to be a lone heir to the Namuzawa’s”
I have wondered if it was known, but more importantly does Tsuyoshi knows and understand this already? To the old woman I smile slightly. “Please continue to look after him.” It’s odd to say this to a complete stranger but I suppose I just needed to say it. To get it out in the open.
She looks at me and simply bows and I bow back lower. After which I go back to our table.
“Well come on! I don’t have all day to wait for you two.” Holding out my hand, I wait for my son to take it.
(OOC: Feel free to move them to market tom. Will finish tomorrow.)
Tsuyoshi-kun looks… I don’t know. But then, he does something that… breaks my heart.
That smile, with the eyes closed. Just like Hajime. And most likely for the same reasons.
“Thank you, Tsuyoshi-kun. I’m glad I have you to help me.” I manage to smile. He doesn’t need to know that I’m upset.
Hajime goes to pay the old woman, and he bows to her, but I can’t hear what he’s saying but I have an idea.
>>Well come on! I don?EUR(TM)t have all day to wait for you two.
I nod and follow them out of the shop, and out in the marketplace. As it’s later in the morning, it’s starting to get crowded with everyone heading out to do their errands, and I have to step fast to keep up. “Tsuyoshi-kun, where do we go?”
Saitou:
It’s a decent walk to the market but I’m glad that the air has lifted somewhat. Tsuyoshi’s skipping ahead of us, running, stopping and then going again. I stay the temptation to just scoop him up and put him on my shoulders. I didn’t do that enough when he was smaller and now he’s grown up…
“Don’t get too far ahead!” I shout at him. I can’t quite run after him since I wouldn’t want to leave Hide alone. I light a cigarette and just watch him… I never thought I’d be watching his back. I’ve always thought that my sons would be watching mine.
Maa… It is what it is… I take shorter puffs on my cigarette.
Tsuyoshi:
Chichi-ue shouts but it’s not too far now… Just a little more.
The market is not too far from where I live with otou-san. That’s what I like about our house, it’s close to everything! I could probably just walk home later… That way Chichi-ue doesn’t have to worry about taking me home later!
?EURoeTsuyoshi-kun, where do we go??EUR?
“Hmmm… I know it’s just around here somewhere.” I run ahead of them and stop by each of the old ladies who are sitting on a rolled tatami along with their goods. Ah… I smile. I think Makoto-chan will like this, it’s very cute, colorful and brings good luck!
“Hide-san!!! Over here!!!” I wave and smile. Looking behind her I see Chichi-ue’s fallen behind a little. He’s moving much slower than usual. I hope he’s not mad at me.
Catching up with Hajime, I see this -look- in his eyes… one that recalls to me again how he looked at Makoto at first. Love… pride… but something holding him back. For once he’s so readable…
I see Tsuyoshi-kun running up to one of the market sellers, and I wave and smile back as he calls for me, and catch up with Hajime, which is -hard- since I’m wearing my kimono very properly, which doesn’t allow for me to move as quickly as I would like.
“Hajime,” I say, quietly, catching up to him, smoking, with those eyes that are strangely transparent, so -distant-. In the folds of my sleeve I reach for his hand. “Don’t stand so far back. It’s like you expect -defeat- in this… which is so strange, my confident ookami-sama. Open up to him while you have the chance. Maybe you can have -something- – perhaps he’ll come down for summer… and maybe realizes there’s more than having a big house.”
I let out a deep breath, and look up at him. “I know it’s my -mission- to fix these problems, but I can’t do it alone, even though I’m sure that’s a condition. He doesn’t know me to listen to me. But he needs the love of the father that’s not going to buy it from him. That man isn’t going to give him a perfect life. You’re a good father, despite what -anyone- has made you believe – I’ve seen it with Makoto, and here you are, having traveled across Japan to see your boys. Don’t let this slip through your fingers, you can’t change the past but you -can- have a future. He’s not lost to you.” I let his hand go, and look over at Tsuyoshi-kun, and then back at him. ” I know you -know- this. But maybe that’s my job. To remind you.” I tilt my head as I look up at him, and smile softly.
I read it and said nothing. I knew I would need to know it later. I hope he knows me enough to know that I’m not being critical… but that I believe in him, and I am an ever-hopeful creature. That relationships broken can be re-built… that children have a deep capacity for love and forgiveness. That these are the brothers of Makoto.
I smile for Tsuyoshi-kun, and go over and inspect the -very- red little creature with a bobbing head. “Oh, that’s -very- cute! She loves animals, you know.” I motion Hajime over. “Don’t you think so? Tsuyoshi-kun, can you tell me about this? I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like this in Kyoto -or- Tokyo… is it a cow?” I don’t think she’s ever seen one…
Saitou:
I hardly noticed that she was holding my hand. I’ve been so engrossed in my own thoughts. Turning, I start to say something but there’s something about what she said…
It?EUR(TM)s like you expect -defeat- in this?EUR?
Do I? Have I really given up and so easily? Taking a deep breath I keep walking.
Maybe you can have -something- – perhaps he?EUR(TM)ll come down for summer?EUR? and maybe realizes there?EUR(TM)s more than having a big house.?EUR?
“He’s not like that…” A low growl comes out of me and I sigh afterwards, “Sorry Hide… I didn’t mean to.. ” Looking back at her I realize this is one of those things that I must tell her as I cannot let it pass like I did Akane. “That child knows my line of work… He told me it didn’t matter because he trusts me. Something as simple as having a big house will not matter to him, if he never complained about the little things… Or the big ones.”
Tsuyoshi may not be as perceptive as his brother but his level of understanding has always surprised even me that sometimes I wonder if he really is just a ten year old boy. And if it was just having a big house, having every thing he wanted and needed… I knew it is something I can provide, maybe not now but in the future. Something else is keeping him here and if only I knew what or why he chose this place then maybe I can be at peace.
I know it?EUR(TM)s my -mission- to fix these problems, but I can?EUR(TM)t do it alone, even though I?EUR(TM)m sure that?EUR(TM)s a condition
I shake my head, “No Hide. It’s not your mission to fix my problems… It is for me to fix and perhaps you to understand.” It would be impossible for her to take on that task. It’s impossible for anyone but myself. “So please…” I look at her, “don’t try so hard to make things right.” I have noticed the extra-ordinary effort she’s been putting in. I’m thankful but it’s naive to think that all these things can be fixed, at least not to our preference.
?EUR? I know you -know- this. But maybe that?EUR(TM)s my job. To remind you.?EUR?
“Thank you.” I say as we finally get to Tsuyoshi who’s now making all the heads of the red cows bob up and down. I almost choke. Of all the things that he could’ve picked out, he picked this one. A cow thought by many to have powers to heal the sick. Sometimes the irony and how small the world is truly amazes me. But I push the images of the past out of my mind and softly nudge another akebeko head.
Tsuyoshi:
Don?EUR(TM)t you think so? Tsuyoshi-kun, can you tell me about this?
“Well you’re right Hide-san, it is a cow.” I smile and reach out to bob more heads like Chichi-ue is doing. “These red ones are special to Aizu. It’s from an old legend about a cow who turned to stone since he gave his soul to buddha. They say it can cure illnesses and even smallpox. But I just mostly like it for it’s bobbing head.”
Chichi-ue turns to look at me. He has an odd look when I mentioned to Hide-san what the cow can do. Maybe he doesn’t believe the legend? But he grins and tussles my hair a bit. I’d tell him I’m too old for that now but I think it’s a force of habit, besides I don’t mind it.
“We’ll take two miss.” Chichi-ue hands the payment to the seller.
“Why’d you buy two?” I ask and carry the paper bag that had the akebeko.
“Wouldn’t you want one?”
“Ohhh….” I take one out and show it to Hide-san again. “See Hide-san, this one is going to go in the middle of my herd.”
“Herd? Do you mean to tell me…” He pulls me to his side. “That you already have many of these?”
“Of course!” I show him the new one he bought for me as we walk away. “That’s why I knew where to buy these.”
“But all akebeko are the same. I don’t think they’d be good to collect.”
“But I like them…” I shake my head, “And they’re not all the same, sometimes they have different sizes… This one is will be special. It’s going to be the leader of the herd.”
I take one last look at the akebeko. It’s a little plain looking but that’s perfect, because Chichi-ue is simple too. Besides I like this gift, it’s not another book like he gave me last time. Suddenly I remember, he has -that-. I look to his other side to see if it’s still there and it is! He’d never let me touch it of course, he scolded me once for trying to take it out of it’s saya. But I wanted to know how a real katana feels like, not those dulled play things we used in the dojo sometimes. They said if you stare at a sword for a long time, it reflects back the soul of it’s owner, his life and experiences… I want to see it for myself. I want to -know-.
(OOC: Tsuyoshi is pointedly looking at Saitou’s sword. You can notice it or not.)
These are hard things to talk about, these old hurts, layers of things that are slowly being pulled back… but what gives me hope is that Tsuyoshi-kun has respect for his father and his father’s job.
>>So please… don’t try so hard to make things right.
That’s hard for me -not- to do. I can’t protect him in the way that he can protect me. So I have to make up for it in other ways. And… I want this child in our lives.
But then I turn my attention to that child, and grin as Hajime touches his hair. I listen to the story and nod. “That makes this an even better gift, Tsuyoshi-kun. Makoto-chan is very healthy unless she gets into food that has peppers in it.” But not wasabi, but she is the niece of -my- brothers. “She will write you to thank you for this.”
I listen as Tsuyoshi-kun speaks of his “herd”, and smile. He’s very imaginative… and bright. I’m glad Hajime bought him one as well.
And then, I catch him staring at… Hajime’s sword? I nudge him and point to a bench set by the river, away from the marketplace. As we sit, I smile at Hajime. “I think that your kendo-talented son has eyes for your katana.” I smile at the boy, and wink at him, since I -saw- him earlier. The same way Tamesaburo used to look at my fathers… and none of them had the talent of this father and son. Eyes of respect, awe…
Makoto-chan is very healthy unless she gets into food that has peppers in it.?EUR?
“I don’t like peppers either!” He tells Hide. “I like sweet things!”
Hasn’t he had enough? That ramen was -very- sweet. Sometimes I wonder where he got that? Neither Tokio and I had a sweet tooth. The sweetest thing she’s ever cooked was that sweet and sour carp.
“Hide-san. You’re from Kyoto right?” He chats her up while we sit by the river, “Chichi-ue has lots of friends there I think. A long time ago I met one, he liked sweets too.” He cups his chin, “But I don’t remember his name.”
My head spins towards Tsuyoshi. How in the world did he remember -him-?
?EURoeI think that your kendo-talented son has eyes for your katana.?EUR?
“Oh is that so?” My hand goes to my katana, tracing the handle, “I don’t know about that.” I’ve never let him hold it. I still don’t think he should. It’s not that I don’t trust him… He’s improved I’m sure he can hold it just fine. But this sword has taken so many lives, there’s nothing for him to see.
>I don?EUR(TM)t like peppers either! I like sweet things!
I laugh. “I’ll have to remember that, Makoto likes sweets but usually fruits like peaches. Do you like pickles? Your father has to sometimes give her a -look- to get her to eat them. But I think she’s getting better, she liked helping me make Eiji-kun his favorites, umeboshi.” I guess he gets that from Tokio, since his father does -not- like sweets.
I nod when he asks me about Kyoto, and then… I smile as he mentions old friends. “That would have been Okita Souji, he was a good friend to your father and I, and yes, -loved- sweets. But we were lucky to know so many great, brave men.” But he -met- Souji? Ah… -there-.
Hajime dismisses Tsuyoshi’s interest in his sword, and I suppress a sigh. Did he miss how that young man looked at it, at him? “Well Tsuyoshi-kun, this is the sword of a brave man too, and it’s been with him through many battles. Such a sword is never to be taken lightly.” I will touch every -inch- of this man and tussle his uniform, but I know my place with regards to his katana. And I am so -proud- of him. Makoto will never know the dangerous childhood that I did, nor will his sons.
I stand. “You two men talk of swords, I saw some -pears- back there in the market.” It would be too late in Tokyo but perhaps this north there’s still some fresh… I can also see what I can find for breakfast tomorrow.
(OOC – Hide will go to some stalls about 20 feet away unless stopped.)
Hide doesn’t argue about the sword. -Good-. But she does leave and I wonder what really is the reason why. I turn around watching her walk back to the market.
“You like her a lot.”
I turn back to look at him. “I suppose I do. Do you like her?”
“She seems nice.” He smiles slightly.
“She is important to me.” I tell him seriously.
“Oh…” His brows furrow. “Tsutomu-nii told me about her.”
“He doesn’t like her?” Oh I ask an obvious question, maybe it is wishful thinking but I would’ve hoped that Tsutomu would understand.
Tsuyoshi shakes his head. “But Tsutomu-nii is like that.”
Oh I know, that stubborn son of mine has the head of an ox, like Hiroaki he isn’t easily swayed by anything. Many would say that he’s more like me but he’s truly not.
“Tsuyoshi…” I light a cigarette, “Whatever your heard about Hide…”
“Don’t worry Chichi-ue. I like her. She takes care of you right?” He smiles.
I nod. I’m still amazed at how easily he took to Hide. “Don’t you want to come back with us? She’ll take care of you too. She’s a good cook. A good mother…” I pause, “I still work but I come home more now.”
“I can’t go…” He looks down, “It’s not that I don’t want to but I think I’m needed here.”
“Don’t say that. You are needed in Tokyo too and you will be treated equally.” He must’ve known already at such an early age what the repurcussions are of being the second son, I was second myself to Hiroaki. On another hand, I do wonder if he thinks he’ll just be in the way now that I do have another family.
He shakes his head. “It’s not that. Uncle Namuzawa has been good to me, to mother and Tsutomu-nii.”
“You don’t have to feel burdened nor obligated to him.” I say seriously, “Let me worry about that.”
“It’s not that Chichi-ue…” He looks again at my sword. “I would like to continue their name.”
I blink. I’d never thought I’d hear something like that from him. “They are good people.” I croak somewhat, “You will also have a good life here…” I say it more for myself than for him.
“Chichi-ue when I get better at kendo, please let me see your sword.” He grins, “I think by summer I’ll be able to hold it well.”
“You’ll have to come to Tokyo then.” I say. Maybe I’m just baiting so he’ll come.
“I’d come to Tokyo anyway Chichi-ue! Uncle said I can anytime I want.” He smiles. “I miss those yams, they don’t sell it here.”
“Hmph!” I reach into my pocket and hand him a few. “I wasn’t going to give you any since you’ve been very troublesome.” I shake my head and smile slightly.
“Thank you Chichi-ue! I’ve missed these!!!”
He takes them happily. I suppose for now this was the best result I could hope for. “You’re a good boy Tsuyoshi. I -am- proud of you.” That I can say without a doubt. I cannot begrudge him for making his own decisions, if he let everyone make the decisions for him, he might’ve believed what everyone else told him. This day could’ve turned out quite differently, just like that rainy day I saw him and his brother.
>You?EUR(TM)re a good boy Tsuyoshi. I -am- proud of you.
I come back, just in time to hear that, with a small basket of pears, and I sit down next to Hajime, and I see Tsuyoshi-kun happily eating… I look. “Tsuyoshi-kun, what is that you have?” I show him the basket. “These are pears, my favorite, the woman at the stall said they were grown right here in Fukushima.” I actually chatted with the woman about her orchard, while keeping an eye on Hajime and Tsuyoshi-kun. I think they needed some time to themselves, I figured that was the -most- useful thing I could do at that moment. “And I found some good things to get for breakfast tomorrow. I’m making a Kyoto-style breakfast for Ueda-sama and Akane-san tomorrow,” I explain to Tsuyoshi-kun.
“You’ll have to tell me all of your favorites, when you come to visit I’ll make them for you.” I look at Hajime, I hope this is possible…
Tsuyoshi:
?EURoeTsuyoshi-kun, what is that you have??EUR?
“Oh these?” I look up and hold up a few pieces for her to take. “They’re caramel yams.”
I smile but I think something is stuck to my teeth so I close my mouth and continue to chew.
?EURoeThese are pears, my favorite, the woman at the stall said they were grown right here in Fukushima.?EUR?
Tilting my head, I ask “Why do you like pears?”
And I found some good things to get for breakfast tomorrow. I?EUR(TM)m making a Kyoto-style breakfast for Ueda-sama and Akane-san tomorrow,?EUR?
“Oh! That would be nice. I’d go but I’m visiting mother…” I look away a little, maybe I shouldn’t have said that?
Saitou:
?EURoeYou?EUR(TM)ll have to tell me all of your favorites, when you come to visit I?EUR(TM)ll make them for you.?EUR?
“Put some sugar in it and he’ll eat anything.” I jest and pull him close to me by the shoulder. I saw what he did just now, but he shouldn’t worry.
“Yoshi I”m visiting them tomorrow too, along with Eiji. How about we go together?”
He nods and looks at Hide, “Are you going to meet my brother?”
Caramel yams? No wonder he seems to concentrate on -chewing- so much. I grin and tell him, “they look good but you should enjoy your treat.” I didn’t see Hajime buy them on the trip, did he bring them all this way? I can’t help but smile at him, my hand resting on his shoulder for a minute.
>>Why do you like pears?
I think for a minute. “They’re a little sweet, and a little tart. Crispy… unless you cook them on a winter’s day with soy sauce, then those are wonderful too.” I take one out of my basket and offer it to Tsuyoshi-kun. “Eat this later. It may help the sticky stuff on your teeth,” I tease.
He mentions that he’ll be at his mother’s in the morning, and looks… strange at that. I smile. “I’ll just have to make it for you the next time I see you, then.”
I can’t stop the grin from escaping when Hajime teases Tsuyoshi-kun. “I’ll remember that, and if I tell Makoto-chan she’ll be taking me to the cake shop…” I laugh, she likes those types of cakes a lot herself.
>>Are you going to meet my brother?
I glance over at Hajime. “I would like to, I -really- would.” I smile at Tsuyoshi-kun a bit. “But I might make everyone uncomfortable, and you’ve seen how pushy I can be,” I grin a little, but then look more seriously. “What’s important is your father getting to see you boys.” Which it is.
I sit back against the bench. I had hoped to meet him, but his mother… I -am- ready for that, or as ready as I’ll -ever- be. If it was about my ego, I would insist… but it’s not. “It’s up to you two, and Eiji-kun. But maybe if I don’t go tomorrow, perhaps I can meet you somewhere later that day to meet Tsutomu-kun?” Maybe neutral ground will be better.
Tsuyoshi:
they look good but you should enjoy your treat.?EUR?
I nod my head. Hide-san is right, I don’t get to buy these here. Maybe I’ll buy a lot of them in Tokyo when I get to visit.
They?EUR(TM)re a little sweet, and a little tart. Crispy?EUR? unless you cook them on a winter?EUR(TM)s day with soy sauce, then those are wonderful too.?EUR?
Can it really be good with soy sauce? I take the pear and put it in my bag. “Thank you! I’d like to taste pears with soy sauce someday.” I tell her. Oh an d she tells me we’ll go to the cake shop too. I like that.
Saitou:
It’s a good thing Tsuyoshi is a very active young boy, otherwise I’d think we’d have a problem with everything he’s been eating… The talk turns to visiting Tokio’s and I see Hide glacing over at me as she tells Tsuyoshi she would like to meet Tsutomu.
?EURoeIt?EUR(TM)s up to you two, and Eiji-kun. But maybe if I don?EUR(TM)t go tomorrow, perhaps I can meet you somewhere later that day to meet Tsutomu-kun??EUR?
“Well we might not have time.” I interject. The truth is, my talk with Tokio might take longer than I anticipate… In which case I need to make plans this afternoon. Standing up I say, “Let’s take you home. I promised your -Uncle- I won’t leave you out here.”
Oh I know what he was planning bringing us here where it’s close by to their house. He wanted to walk home by himself, but if Namuzawa fetches him from that store everytime, then I’m not about to be outdone… This time at least.
(OOC: You may close.. Bring Tsuyoshi home etc.)
>>Thank you! I?EUR(TM)d like to taste pears with soy sauce someday.
I smile. “I’ll make sure you do someday.” Someday…
Hajime tells me that there may not be time to see Tsutomu-kun and I -am- disappointed by that. But we do need to take Tsuyoshi-kun back to the Namazawa’s, it’s better we drop him off than letting him go off by himself. He -is- a big boy and this isn’t Tokyo, but -still-…
I smile and bow as we leave him, and walk off with Hajime. We’ll need to get back to the market if I’m to make that breakfast tomorrow…
(OOC: Close thread)