My first kiss was stolen when I was… I can’t remember if it was before or after my birthday that year, the same year Tamesaborou was born, so it was right before I turned eight? I know I was in a kimono by then, after shin-go-ichi. But I remember the boy – Fukunaga Keitaro.
A group of neighborhood children were playing – a house in Mibu had recently been pulled down after a fire, and while it was waiting to be rebuilt, it made an excellent play-place for us children. At my great age I didn’t join in the playtime, which that day consisted of jumping from displaced rocks and logs, or the usual stick-sword battles that the boys favored. I had, instead, graduated to the onee-sans, the girls who sat on the side, maybe working on some needlework, and looking after the younger ones.
I was proud to be sitting there, to be a big girl, to be growing up and useful.
Sometimes the boys would come over and hassle us, asking for snacks (it was assumed that we had the responsibility for feeding them!), or just being pesky.
But Keitaro-kun kept pestering me in particular.
“Hide-chan! Lookit!” He would stand in the dusty yard and perform some feat of strength – throwing a charred log, leaping between two far rocks, or trying to shove down some of the smaller children.
And I would go back to my needlework, or talk with the other girls.
But at the end of one day, Keitaro-kun follows me home. “Hey, Hide-chan – my father said that I’m supposed to marry you!” And he grabs my shoulders and pushes his wet lips on mine. I push him back, into the dirt, and go running inside, to tell my parents, and wash my face -completely-.
It’s not too long before Keitaro-kun returns, with his father. He’s a rather loud and boorish man. Good connections, they say, but he’s not made a decisive stance in the current political situation but is having a good time throwing his opinions around. He came to our house that afternoon, beaming with an arrogant pride as he strode into our formal room.
“Haha, that son of mine! He sees what he wants and takes it,” he said, smugly, crossing his arms across his belly. “So, let’s start talking about making it official – adopting him into your house to marry your girl.” He looks around the room, as if he was sizing it up. “Yes, this will be a good alliance – Keitaro-kun can of course inherit your positions in Mibu, in time.”
I remember that I didn’t like Keitaro-kun at all, even before that day. He was mean to the girls and bossed the boys around. But Fukunaga-san looked self-congratulatory. “Well, my boy, you did very well.” Keitaro-kun mimics his father’s expression, puffing up. “Hide-chan didn’t seem to mind.”
It was then that Otou-san finally spoke. “But we’ve not agreed to anything, and we’re not likely to,” he said, slowly. “You see, my wife is expecting again, and she’s far along now – perhaps we’ll get the son our family needs.”
My mother pulled me close, and murmured, “ah, to speak of such things!” She had been ill lately, with Obaa-san hovering around… but back then, I didn’t notice.
Fukunaga-san just laughed. “You’ve been hopeful for how many years? It’s time you secure your house – and here I am, offering you a great fruit from my tree – he’s strong and healthy and he’ll take good care of your girl.” He affectionately cuffs his son on his shoulder.
“I’m saying no, Fukunaga-san,” my father said. “And your son needs to apologize to Hide-chan. His treatment of her was shameful.”
“Don’t be so stuffy, Yagi-san. That’s how I got my other boys married off – they make certain to ‘claim’ their girl.” His grin is sly. “-My- wife gave me seven good, strong sons – my only problem is finding an appropriate little heiress to marry each one off to!”
“You’ll have to keep looking, then. Even if we were not expecting another child, I do not think this would be a good alliance – my daughter shouldn’t be married to a man who was raised to treat women as such,” my father says.
It’s then that mother rises and takes me with her, to the kitchen, where she leaves me with the servants. Some time later some other men, my father’s friends, come to the house, and, finally, Keitaro-kun and his father leave.
Since my mother -is- having a baby I don’t go out to visit with the other girls as much, and besides, a new house is finally going up so the play switches to another empty lot. I stay and help get things ready as my mother’s stomach swells… all while I pray for a brother so that I don’t have to marry such a terrible boy.
I heard from my brothers, that Keitaro-kun died during the war – he had taken the Choshuu side. And I get a brother, and then a second, and with the war, and the question of my marriage became a decision that my father seemed loath to make.
It would be many, many years before I was kissed again. Not until an old friend came into my life, with the sound of bells, and changed it entirely.