I left early, I needed to leave the house after last night. I knew it was a bad idea. It was late and we were in an unfamiliar room. I haven’t seen her in a while and haven’t truly spoken to her for much longer it seems. But I couldn’t help myself and capitulated anyway. I’ve been wanting her and gave in to my selfishness.
I should’ve known this place was unforgiving.
In a way it unnerves me what the future may hold. So many people coming into our lives, some welcome, some are not but all of them with some baggage that must be dealt with by her and I. And I know that if I let myself focus too much on us, that there will be consequences that would spill over to my work. And if I focus on my work, we all know where that leads to even if she tells me to remember that she’s always behind me. We haven’t truly been put through the fire haven’t we? These things we are seeing today are only slight obstacles… And I worry at how she’s taking it. Especially now that I can’t seem to find a way to reach out to her outside this space where our talks are more free and less scripted. I’ve not been able to find a solution. And yet only in this Tokyo can our story progress and come to some conclusion. I can feel my eyes narrow as I inhale the cigarette.
Conclusion huh? I’ve bee told once why I chose to be in my current marital status, I didn’t dignify that with an answer but then, even my adopted son had seemed to have stumbled upon it. They’re all likely wrong. Stopping I throw the cigarette butt to the ground, watching it fizzle.
I’ve been going around in circles in my old patrol route and going through my last packet of cigarettes and there’s still one day before Monday. It’s probably time. So I divert from my usual path and go out further from the inner city core, where the streets become wider and the trees provide a bigger shade. It’s not the first time I came here. I came here last week checking up on my ward fully dressed in uniform and got the door firmly shut on my face by that old woman.
Who was she? His mother?
Finally there -again-. I finish the cigarette, straighten out my shirt and prepare to knock. Perhaps now that I’m not on official duty nor in uniform I’ll be allowed in?
“Excuse me!” I shout and knock at the door. “Can you please open up? I have business with Naruhodo Shindou-kun!”
I stand a bit on my toes so I can look over the gate. Thankfully it’s a modest gate and not too tall. “Excuse me!” I call out again.
Finally after a few more moments of waiting, the gates open and it’s the same older woman from before. She’s older likely in her mid-50s and of shorter stature? I grin a little at her and her eyes grow wide as she finally recognizes who I am and at once tries to close the gate.
“Hold on!” I wedge my hand on the door, stopping the gate from completely closing but she presses against the gate and I grimace as the back of my hand and palm is sandwiched forcefully in between. “If you press any harder obaa-san, you’ll break my hand.”
“I know that!” And of course she pushes it. But I’m pushing back with my right hand so she doesn’t crush my left.
“Go away!”
“Obaa-san, I haven’t even introduced myself.”
“We don’t need to know you!”
“Please…” Finally I’m able to push the door just slightly ajar to free my left while ensuring keeping the door open. I must really be a decrepit if I lose to an -old- woman.
“I’m Fujita Goro from the Police Department. I work with Shindou-kun.” I tell her hoping -now- she’d let me in. But instead a broom is brought out and my left hand is hammered with the stick.
“Go away! Away! Away! Away!” I grunt with the force she’s hammering my hand with and now see it starting to bruise and welt. Without much choice, I decide to push open the door completely and catch her broom in both of my hands and put it away.
“Please calm down Madame!” I tell the brutish woman. “Please hear me out. I just want to speak to Shindou-kun.”
Seeing as I’ve now overpowered her, she gives me a seeting look and crosses her arms, seemingly standing in my way. I could of course just go past her but something tells me that’s not going to get us very far.
“Are you Shindou’s mother?”
“I’m not telling you anything! And he’s not here! Hmph!”
“I see.” I sigh a little, she won’t cooperate it seems. “Alright since you won’t tell me anything then I’ll tell you something. You are Naruhodo Hisa a farmer’s daughter, originally from Edo, has one son Naruhodo Shindou who took your family’s name instead of his fathers. You have raised your son alone through odd jobs but thankfully you inherited land from your family which you sold to buy this small house in the outskirts of the city so your son could be educated here in Tokyo. You and your son has lived alone in this residence all your lives. Your son was able to join the police because the Meiji government has allowed all young men of merit to be able to serve regardless of familial circumstances.”
She glares at me and starts shaking…. For a minute I’m concerned I may have overdone it and she may have a heart attack but instead, she grabs the broom again and starts hitting me with it with total abandon. I try to shield myself with my arms but an old woman’s wrath is not something a wolf can defend against it seems.
“Get out! GET OUT!!!!” She starts screaming and I’m starting to think Shindou must really not be inside. I mean the commotion this woman is enough to wake the neighbors 3 blocks over!
“Madame please…” I finally catch her hands with the broom and once again place it aside. This time I hold in my grip -both of her hands. “I just need to speak to Shindou. He’s quit his job at the Precinct…”
“And he’s not going back! I don’t know what you people did to him there!” She’s angry but then suddenly grins, “I’ve been asking him to leave that dangerous job for many years and now he’s finally done it!”
“You don’t know what you’re doing.” I tell the woman, “He is a good Policeman. Lacking a bit more training but true to his duty. Japan needs more men like him. He’s an asset to the Meiji government.”
“And what has this Japan and Meiji government given back to my son?” She spits at my face and I blink and let her go and wipe it off.
“You in the Police… No the government just take and take. When he was younger the Samurai “customs” showed him his worthlesness. Then your Meiji government with it’s civil codes come along and still leaves my son without any rights! Now the Meiji seeing “use” for my son suddenly wants him so he can put his life in danger every day… And yet get barely anything. I know my son almost got killed! GET OUT!!!”
I blink. This woman… But I straighten up. There is no reasoning for now with a woman scorned this way. She merely looks at me as another Meiji official which I am in a way. And I do want her son back not just for Japan or the Meiji but for my own purposes. I bow slightly, “Please tell Shindou that I, Fujita Goro stopped by. Tell him that I his commanding officer refuses to accept his resignation.”
I’ll be back. I don’t know how. But I will.
I leave the woman still huffing and all red for now. Looking down on my arms I see the welts left by her broom and my left hand is swollen with marks of purple. At least it’s not broken I tell myself.
I’m tempted to go home but there’s one more stop I should make. Before that though I should see to some lunch.