I decline Kanbee?EUR(TM)s invitation for lunch, it is way past that after all. Besides, I need to be alone.
?EURoeIt?EUR(TM)s not my place Goro, but is something the matter??EUR?
?EURoeNO.?EUR?
He looks at me, not believing me of course. ?EURoeIt?EUR(TM)s not a problem with that wonderful new woman of yours.?EUR?
?EURoeNo it?EUR(TM)s not. And she?EUR(TM)s not new nor ?EURjust- my woman Kanbee.?EUR? I hiss slightly at that.
?EURoeSumanai. You know when I use the word, it?EUR(TM)s not how others would.?EUR? He sighs and closes the gates behind him. ?EURoeCome let us talk even for just a minute.?EUR?
?EURoeWhat do you want from me Kanbee??EUR? I ask puffing on my cigarette. I?EUR(TM)m going through my cigarettes like a fiend today it seems. I?EUR(TM)m sure my voice will be hoarse later.
?EURoeWhere did you go today??EUR?
I shrug, ?EURoeI visited Kurosawa.?EUR?
?EURoeOh but he?EUR(TM)s out in Kyoto. Ah?EUR? You visited with your wife.?EUR?
I don?EUR(TM)t say anything as we walk to an open rice field. I look across and see the rice paddies not yet filled with water.
?EURoeI reckon you wouldn?EUR(TM)t just visit her to see how she?EUR(TM)s been.?EUR? He looks to where I?EUR(TM)m looking, far out in the distance. ?EURoeWere you trying to make things right? I mean with Yagi-san and Tokio??EUR?
?EURoeKanbee,?EUR? I look at him, ?EURoeThis is really none of your business.?EUR?
?EURoeBut you see Goro, you don?EUR(TM)t have anyone to talk to about this don?EUR(TM) t you? None of the Shinsengumi men are here and I doubt you?EUR(TM)ve made friends at the Police Bureau, they?EUR(TM)d probably use the information against you and accuse you of impropriety. Here why don?EUR(TM)t you give me one of that.?EUR?
He points to my cigarette and I was just about to refuse but I give him one anyway. Maybe the tobacco will help him to stop talking. He lights up but to my dismay keeps on going.
?EURoeI?EUR(TM)m sure you won?EUR(TM)t tell Yagi-san anything either being the secretive man that you are.?EUR? He ashes the cigarette, ?EURoeBut I can tell you this, for all the times you?EUR(TM)ve kept your silence, it never ended up well did it??EUR?
We are married by way of Shizoku, you can simply give me a Mikudarihan and you can be free Goro. I know those of which he speaks about. That night that almost destroyed Yaso and I. And the rumors later that did in fact destroy her and set me on this path to hell. No not hell. It was not always that.
I let out a long trail of smoke. ?EURoeEven if I were to speak about this, it would serve no purpose.?EUR? Tilting my head I stare at him, ?EURoeHow would you go about telling the woman who?EUR(TM)s been waiting for you the past six years, already has your child and another on the way that you can?EUR(TM)t marry her??EUR?
?EURoeSo I was right! She?EUR(TM)s waited that long for you huh? Sheesh, I swear Goro when it comes to women you are both one very lucky and one much -more- unlucky ?EURbastard-.?EUR?
I nod, I don?EUR(TM)t tell him that we?EUR(TM)ve been separated for most of that time but I do grin at his comment. If it had been any later, maybe I would ask him to go drinking with me but even for myself, mid afternoon is too early for drinking.
?EURoeFine then. Don?EUR(TM)t tell her about what happened here with Tokio. After all there will be other times, though I caution you about her brother Morinosuke. Times have changed and it seems that it?EUR(TM)s favored him quite well.?EUR?
?EURoeI don?EUR(TM)t care about him.?EUR?
?EURoeI know but I?EUR(TM)m saying just be careful.?EUR?
Shaking my head a let out a sigh. ?EURoeI should go Kanbee.?EUR?
?EURoeFine but again Goro, it?EUR(TM)s not good to keep everything to yourself. I know you won?EUR(TM)t listen to me but I?EUR(TM)m older and ?EURwiser- now.?EUR?
?EURoeTch.?EUR? I scoff but also grin at the same time.
?EURoeDid you ever speak to Yagi-san about Shinoda-san??EUR?
I don?EUR(TM)t answer that.
He shakes his head, ?EURoeThen you must not be that serious about Yagi-san then.?EUR?
?EURoeYou are impossible Kanbee. I should leave.?EUR? Ah how many times did I tell him goodbye today? But as for speaking to Hide about all of this, I?EUR(TM)m afraid that is ?EURout- of the question. Tokio I may speak to her about, because it is one that affects our future and we came from that place that had the wilderness.
But Gonohe is separate. I?EUR(TM)ve already told Hide enough. I will not speak of the rest. It is not something we can share. -Never-. It is dead after all.